I just saw a post on Google+ that got me all riled up. It was an image of Obama and Romney with the caption "If you vote for either man, you vote for more WAR." It's essentially urging people not to vote. I can't let this go unanswered. So I'll be going up on my soapbox for a while here.
True, the system is not perfect by any means. But as for this election year, it is the way it is. Not voting is tantamount to saying "I have no say in this government, so therefore I will not complain about the consequences, nor celebrate them." I will never understand where, in a country where we actually have the freedom to influence our government (regardless of whether it is not as much as some might like), people don't take advantage of their rights as citizens. There are some people who talk a lot of bloated ideals about how the country is all wrong. Then, when the time comes to actually change things by voting, they don't even do it.
But I believe that voting alone is not enough nowadays. The media is so biased in their coverage of so-called "news" that often, the candidates are picked for us. Images are smeared by those in a position to influence what we see, and too often we let them be. I think what we should do is *get involved!!* We need to write letters to our congressmen, our representatives and tell them what we want done in our government! Because it is not THE government, it is OUR government. I think we have failed to remember that fact.
When we don't get involved with our government, we are really giving the government free reign over our lives. Take congress for example. Congressional spending is at its highest point since WWII, when, at its peak, the government spent 53% of the country's Gross National Product. That means that over half of the wealth of this country was going into the war effort. Now the government is spending approximately 45% of our GDP, meaning 45% of the country's wealth is being spent. On what, you may ask? There is no World War on right now, no threat so grave to the United States that every one of us is getting involved in the effort. So why does our government need to spend so much of our money? That's something we need to keep them accountable about.
And nowadays, maybe writing our government officials is not enough. One of the greatest influencers of public opinion is the press. We should be getting involved in that as well. We could be writing our local and national news services about keeping their objectivity in covering the news, especially when it comes to picking the stories. Too often stories of great magnitude are ignored by the mass media because it doesn't fit in with their political agenda. Well, news services are not to have a political agenda, and I really believe we can fix that. If we can boycott a major news network to share news that we feel is very important, and then write to them WHY we're boycotting them, I believe we'll see a change.
So all this to say, I don't think the solution to changing the way things are done in our government is to not be involved. Quite the opposite! We should be involved in OUR government. After all, it is a government "by the people, for the people".
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
The Time That Is Given Us
Life truly can be fleeting sometimes. Once a moment's there, it's already gone. In our culture today, much emphasis is put on what we do in every single moment we do. We must fill up our time with something, no matter what it is. Maybe this is due to the prevalence and availability of entertainment on mobile devices; maybe it's due to the "youtube generation" mentality that has seemed to lessen our attention span. Whatever the reason, emphasis is made to make use of every moment, even if it is to waste it on playing a game of Angry Birds.
I'm reminded of a line from Tolkien's masterpiece, The Fellowship of The Ring: "All we have to do is decide what to do with the time that is given us."
I think this phrase has been lost on many a people these days.
In my mind, there are two extremes of utilizing every moment: by working or by wasting it.
Workers can tend to argue that we should use every moment we have to further the universe, ourselves, others, etc. They say we should work endlessly towards a common goal of world peace, saving the environment, or simply making the world a better place. Some even go so far as to say if you waste any moment just not doing anything, you're actually making the world worse by your inaction. These people may have admirable causes; their work may in fact lead to great things. But, do they really stop and just enjoy this world we're living in? I mean, without trying to fix it?
Or more simply, workers can just be busy doing seventeen different activities during the week- between one or two jobs, school, community work & church activities. I've seen many a family an individual seem to be buried in their datebooks and calendars. For workers, the phrase "stop and smell the roses", I think, is an apt one.
And then some of us go the other way entirely. They would be the wasters. They have to be entertained or doing something at every moment of every day. I'm the first to admit that, unfortunately, I'm often one of them. Like many in this country, I have a phone that connects to the internet. As such, I have a myriad of entertainment resources in my hand at any given time. I could watch a youtube video while IM-ing a friend while texting a family member while looking up the meaning of "prestidigitation". (For the record, I just looked it up. To paraphrase, it means to be quick with your hands and tricky.) But that's precisely what I mean. We waste our time.
I especially see a lot of this in waiting rooms. Once people are seated in a room with nothing to do but (God forbid!) talk to one another, they break out their phones. I know, I'm also guilty of this. It just amazes me how we're so disconnected with the world around us. And I don't mean in a broad, global sense. I mean in a 'I-never-saw-that-monkey-across-the-room-because-I-was-updating-my-status-on-Facebook' sense.
So going back to my nerdy quote, "All we have to do is decide what to do with the time that is given us."
Sometimes we can forget what's really important and forget to live. Either we can focus on utilizing every single moment, or we can consciously decide to look around us.
I feel many of us need to raise our head out of our little world, and go into the world around us. Say hello to a perfect stranger. Try to strike up a real meaningful conversation with the person standing in the grocery store line with you. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable once in a while.
Or just take a few moments and simply look at the world around you. I mean really look. Smell the air, look at the beauty of the clouds in the sky, listen to the sounds that permeate the world around you. When I was starting college at a little community college in Washington, there was this walking path that ran around a lake and up a hill that overlooked the town. I consider the hours I spent there the most fulfilling of my time there. It helped revitalize me at a time when I really needed it.
Lastly, try to look at the people around you. Try to pay attention to their words and actions even more closely. If you see something you like about someone, let them know about it. If you see someone do something admirable, why not thank them? Or if you notice that shirt that your coworker is wearing really looks nice, go ahead and tell them. Believe me, a simple compliment can make someone's day.
I hope you will decide to use some of your given time to really live, as I will hope to do.
I sincerely hope your day is a blessed one.
I'm reminded of a line from Tolkien's masterpiece, The Fellowship of The Ring: "All we have to do is decide what to do with the time that is given us."
I think this phrase has been lost on many a people these days.
In my mind, there are two extremes of utilizing every moment: by working or by wasting it.
Workers can tend to argue that we should use every moment we have to further the universe, ourselves, others, etc. They say we should work endlessly towards a common goal of world peace, saving the environment, or simply making the world a better place. Some even go so far as to say if you waste any moment just not doing anything, you're actually making the world worse by your inaction. These people may have admirable causes; their work may in fact lead to great things. But, do they really stop and just enjoy this world we're living in? I mean, without trying to fix it?
Or more simply, workers can just be busy doing seventeen different activities during the week- between one or two jobs, school, community work & church activities. I've seen many a family an individual seem to be buried in their datebooks and calendars. For workers, the phrase "stop and smell the roses", I think, is an apt one.
And then some of us go the other way entirely. They would be the wasters. They have to be entertained or doing something at every moment of every day. I'm the first to admit that, unfortunately, I'm often one of them. Like many in this country, I have a phone that connects to the internet. As such, I have a myriad of entertainment resources in my hand at any given time. I could watch a youtube video while IM-ing a friend while texting a family member while looking up the meaning of "prestidigitation". (For the record, I just looked it up. To paraphrase, it means to be quick with your hands and tricky.) But that's precisely what I mean. We waste our time.
I especially see a lot of this in waiting rooms. Once people are seated in a room with nothing to do but (God forbid!) talk to one another, they break out their phones. I know, I'm also guilty of this. It just amazes me how we're so disconnected with the world around us. And I don't mean in a broad, global sense. I mean in a 'I-never-saw-that-monkey-across-the-room-because-I-was-updating-my-status-on-Facebook' sense.
So going back to my nerdy quote, "All we have to do is decide what to do with the time that is given us."
Sometimes we can forget what's really important and forget to live. Either we can focus on utilizing every single moment, or we can consciously decide to look around us.
I feel many of us need to raise our head out of our little world, and go into the world around us. Say hello to a perfect stranger. Try to strike up a real meaningful conversation with the person standing in the grocery store line with you. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable once in a while.
Or just take a few moments and simply look at the world around you. I mean really look. Smell the air, look at the beauty of the clouds in the sky, listen to the sounds that permeate the world around you. When I was starting college at a little community college in Washington, there was this walking path that ran around a lake and up a hill that overlooked the town. I consider the hours I spent there the most fulfilling of my time there. It helped revitalize me at a time when I really needed it.
Lastly, try to look at the people around you. Try to pay attention to their words and actions even more closely. If you see something you like about someone, let them know about it. If you see someone do something admirable, why not thank them? Or if you notice that shirt that your coworker is wearing really looks nice, go ahead and tell them. Believe me, a simple compliment can make someone's day.
I hope you will decide to use some of your given time to really live, as I will hope to do.
I sincerely hope your day is a blessed one.
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Musings of an insomniac
Did you ever have one of those dreams that when you woke up, you wish you could just go back to sleep and keep dreaming? You know one of those dreams where it seems so interesting you don't really want to stop dreaming. I had one of those dreams the other night. It was one of those times where you wish you could get on your computer and play the game or watch the movie but it only exists in your head. Of course, when I woke up I couldn't remember most of it. I thought it was so very interesting.
As I recall, there was a lot a running and some gun play involved. When I woke up, all I wanted to do was get back in the dream and find out how it ended. I find it fascinating that our minds can make up these wild stories and scenarios while we sleep. It seems as if our unconscious mind's capacity to create is uninhibited and set free while our conscious minds are inactive.
The human brain is truly a remarkable creation.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
You Might Be From the Northwest...
You might be from the Northwest...
...If you think people who order decaf coffee are wusses.
...If you actually look forward to rain because it reminds you of back home.
...If you remember "Almost Live" and secretly wish they'd bring it back.
...If you find it strange that the closest coffee shop is more than a block away.
...If you never wash your car because you know it won't matter once it rains again.
...If you still wear a coat everywhere you go because it might rain.
...If you think of Mt. Rainier as "your mountain".
...If, before you move to a new place, you memorize where the Starbucks's are.
...If you own a lot of outdoorsy stuff but have never used it.
...If you wear socks with sandals and don't understand why it's such a big deal.
... If you've been to Canada more than four times this year.
...If you know how to pronounce "geoduck" correctly. And you actually know what it is.
...If you know how to pronounce "Puyallup" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Mukilteo" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Spokane" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Sequim" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Steilacoom" correctly.
...If you either get really annoyed or laugh out loud when people mispronounce all of those words.
...If you knew the seasons as: Wet, Wet and Cold, Wet and Warmer, and 2 Days of Sunshine.
...If you don't see anything as traffic unless you're stuck in it for more than an hour.
...If you laugh at people who say that they have bad traffic when it always stays above 20 miles an hour.
...If, when you move to another state, it takes your eyes over a year to get used to that bright yellow orb in the sky.
And last but not least,
You might be from the Northwest if you laughed at every one of these!
Enjoy your day!
...If you think people who order decaf coffee are wusses.
...If you actually look forward to rain because it reminds you of back home.
...If you remember "Almost Live" and secretly wish they'd bring it back.
...If you find it strange that the closest coffee shop is more than a block away.
...If you never wash your car because you know it won't matter once it rains again.
...If you still wear a coat everywhere you go because it might rain.
...If you think of Mt. Rainier as "your mountain".
...If, before you move to a new place, you memorize where the Starbucks's are.
...If you own a lot of outdoorsy stuff but have never used it.
...If you wear socks with sandals and don't understand why it's such a big deal.
... If you've been to Canada more than four times this year.
...If you know how to pronounce "geoduck" correctly. And you actually know what it is.
...If you know how to pronounce "Puyallup" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Mukilteo" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Spokane" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Sequim" correctly.
...If you know how to pronounce "Steilacoom" correctly.
...If you either get really annoyed or laugh out loud when people mispronounce all of those words.
...If you knew the seasons as: Wet, Wet and Cold, Wet and Warmer, and 2 Days of Sunshine.
...If you don't see anything as traffic unless you're stuck in it for more than an hour.
...If you laugh at people who say that they have bad traffic when it always stays above 20 miles an hour.
...If, when you move to another state, it takes your eyes over a year to get used to that bright yellow orb in the sky.
And last but not least,
You might be from the Northwest if you laughed at every one of these!
Enjoy your day!
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Thanksgiving
So today, as we gather around the dinner table for all the tasty yummy stuff, let's take a moment to reflect on what we have.
If you're reading this, you have access to the internet. It's a wonderful tool that many don't have access to.
If you're going to be sitting down to a dinner table to eat your Thanksgiving feast, you have food to eat. Many in the world are struggling to find food, and many can't. Also, you have a place to live and furniture in it. You are a blessed person!
If you're going to sit down with others at your table, you have people who care about you.
If you watched the Macy's Thanksgiving day parade this morning, congratulations. You have a television and TV service in order to do so.
But most of all, if when you sit down at the dinner table to eat you pray to the God of Heaven whom you love, you have the most wonderful blessing of all. You have Him.
If you're reading this, you have access to the internet. It's a wonderful tool that many don't have access to.
If you're going to be sitting down to a dinner table to eat your Thanksgiving feast, you have food to eat. Many in the world are struggling to find food, and many can't. Also, you have a place to live and furniture in it. You are a blessed person!
If you're going to sit down with others at your table, you have people who care about you.
If you watched the Macy's Thanksgiving day parade this morning, congratulations. You have a television and TV service in order to do so.
But most of all, if when you sit down at the dinner table to eat you pray to the God of Heaven whom you love, you have the most wonderful blessing of all. You have Him.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
The deal with Star Trek: Enterprise
You know, when you sit around waiting for somebody to come to your house, it gets rather boring. You find stuff to do. Like laundry. :-/ Although I have to admit, listening to some great jazz while being slightly bored isn't too bad.
Okay, so I don't really know what to write right now. I'm just rambling on. So I guess I'll just tell ya what's going on today.
Well, we had a big storm around here about a month ago. Big hailstones, high winds, tornado warnings and the like. Eh, it's Oklahoma. But after that storm, Mom and Dad figured we should get the roof on the house looked at. We got a roof inspector to come to the house and he said we had some damage and should really get it replaced. Normally that would be really expensive, but their insurance covers storm damage. And I guess insurance companies would much rather replace a roof than have to handle the claim if it wasn't replaced. So the insurance adjuster is coming in a couple hours to inspect the roof himself to see if they'll replace it or not. And right now, I'm waiting for the roof inspector to come back and mark the damaged spots once again. I think he was supposed to come around 11. It's 11:46. So I'm still waiting.
I have to admit, I kind of hate being stuck at home sometimes. But lately, I've been watching Star Trek Enterprise. I've already gotten through seasons 1&3. I think it might have really improved if was given another couple years. But the whole premise of a prequel series was just a really bad idea, in my opinion. Also, with so many sci-fi shows around with a setting of present-day, I think the whole Star Trek franchise is on its way out.
I think that nowadays, people want more realism and believability. Star Trek is entirely fiction. The UFP (United Federation of Planets) and Starfleet are entire fiction. Even the setting is fiction. Take Stargete SG-1, for example. It was the longest-running science fiction show besides Doctor Who, and ran the same time Enterprise did. (Enterprise ran from 2001-2005 I believe, while SG-1 ran 1997-2008) It was set on Earth, during the years of its production. The organization that the main characters were in was the U.S. Air Force. So the setting was familiar. Sure, they went to other planets and fought aliens, but at the end of the show, they would always return to present-day Earth. It grounded the show. The Star Trek franchise has no such grounding. Sure, just about everyone in the world with TV has heard of Starfleet and the Federation. But nowadays, without an active crew on TV or on the big screen, the public interest for Star Trek may be dwindling*. And without the interest in Star Trek, unfamiliar viewers (non-nerds) may not find anything to relate to. Those who don't know the background of the Federation (a fictional creation and institution) may simply be confused by what goes on. With so many sci-fi shows being based in current times, they may gain an audience that alienated (pun totally intended!) by Star Trek.
Also, I think the idea of a prequel was a big risk for the franchise. Ultimately, it was a bust. There may be a few reasons for this. Quite a lot of fans know the canon quite well, and when you have a prequel series, you run the risk of messing with continuity. The writers are quite limited in what they can do. Granted, this could have been an opportunity for the writers of Star Trek to show how good they were in creating new stories while keeping with canon. But that didn't happen. The writers pretty much screwed the canon and threw continuity out the window. And fans noticed. And they left.
Another reason it might have failed was because it was moving backwards. Star Trek fans had been moving forward since the beginning in the '60's. With the movies after the original series, the plot of every one took place after the last. It was a continuing story that had a flow. Then with TNG on TV and the movies, the story continued moving forward. DS9 did the same thing. Voyager, while set on the other side of the galaxy, was still moving forward within a timeline. Then came Enterprise. It was so random, so out of place that I think many fans just weren't ready for it. Also, after 16 years of TV episodes and something like 8 movies by then, they'd ran out of original stories long ago. And what with the limits that technology and continuity brought them with the prequel, it was almost destined to fail in the writing department.
The casting for Enterprise always seemed to me like it was not thought out very well. The chemistry wasn't all that great from the get-go, and I thought that the choice of Scott Bakula for the captain was all wrong. Granted, as the series went on, the chemistry improved and so did the acting. As with all the Star Trek series up to that point, it was starting to come into its own. But it was too late. It had lost too many fans and wasn't attracting enough new ones. So it crashed and burned. To many in the Star Trek community, it remains the black mark in an otherwise stellar franchise. (Yep, that pun was intended too.)
*I'd like to clarify this statement. Star Trek has prbably the most dedicated fans of any TV show and movie franchise in history. To be sure, these people will always be trekkers and will support the franchise and watch the shows and movies. What I refer to here are new viewers, people who have either never watched Star Trek or who have never been interested in it. "Non-fan, new viewers", so to speak.
Okay, so I don't really know what to write right now. I'm just rambling on. So I guess I'll just tell ya what's going on today.
Well, we had a big storm around here about a month ago. Big hailstones, high winds, tornado warnings and the like. Eh, it's Oklahoma. But after that storm, Mom and Dad figured we should get the roof on the house looked at. We got a roof inspector to come to the house and he said we had some damage and should really get it replaced. Normally that would be really expensive, but their insurance covers storm damage. And I guess insurance companies would much rather replace a roof than have to handle the claim if it wasn't replaced. So the insurance adjuster is coming in a couple hours to inspect the roof himself to see if they'll replace it or not. And right now, I'm waiting for the roof inspector to come back and mark the damaged spots once again. I think he was supposed to come around 11. It's 11:46. So I'm still waiting.
I have to admit, I kind of hate being stuck at home sometimes. But lately, I've been watching Star Trek Enterprise. I've already gotten through seasons 1&3. I think it might have really improved if was given another couple years. But the whole premise of a prequel series was just a really bad idea, in my opinion. Also, with so many sci-fi shows around with a setting of present-day, I think the whole Star Trek franchise is on its way out.
I think that nowadays, people want more realism and believability. Star Trek is entirely fiction. The UFP (United Federation of Planets) and Starfleet are entire fiction. Even the setting is fiction. Take Stargete SG-1, for example. It was the longest-running science fiction show besides Doctor Who, and ran the same time Enterprise did. (Enterprise ran from 2001-2005 I believe, while SG-1 ran 1997-2008) It was set on Earth, during the years of its production. The organization that the main characters were in was the U.S. Air Force. So the setting was familiar. Sure, they went to other planets and fought aliens, but at the end of the show, they would always return to present-day Earth. It grounded the show. The Star Trek franchise has no such grounding. Sure, just about everyone in the world with TV has heard of Starfleet and the Federation. But nowadays, without an active crew on TV or on the big screen, the public interest for Star Trek may be dwindling*. And without the interest in Star Trek, unfamiliar viewers (non-nerds) may not find anything to relate to. Those who don't know the background of the Federation (a fictional creation and institution) may simply be confused by what goes on. With so many sci-fi shows being based in current times, they may gain an audience that alienated (pun totally intended!) by Star Trek.
Also, I think the idea of a prequel was a big risk for the franchise. Ultimately, it was a bust. There may be a few reasons for this. Quite a lot of fans know the canon quite well, and when you have a prequel series, you run the risk of messing with continuity. The writers are quite limited in what they can do. Granted, this could have been an opportunity for the writers of Star Trek to show how good they were in creating new stories while keeping with canon. But that didn't happen. The writers pretty much screwed the canon and threw continuity out the window. And fans noticed. And they left.
Another reason it might have failed was because it was moving backwards. Star Trek fans had been moving forward since the beginning in the '60's. With the movies after the original series, the plot of every one took place after the last. It was a continuing story that had a flow. Then with TNG on TV and the movies, the story continued moving forward. DS9 did the same thing. Voyager, while set on the other side of the galaxy, was still moving forward within a timeline. Then came Enterprise. It was so random, so out of place that I think many fans just weren't ready for it. Also, after 16 years of TV episodes and something like 8 movies by then, they'd ran out of original stories long ago. And what with the limits that technology and continuity brought them with the prequel, it was almost destined to fail in the writing department.
The casting for Enterprise always seemed to me like it was not thought out very well. The chemistry wasn't all that great from the get-go, and I thought that the choice of Scott Bakula for the captain was all wrong. Granted, as the series went on, the chemistry improved and so did the acting. As with all the Star Trek series up to that point, it was starting to come into its own. But it was too late. It had lost too many fans and wasn't attracting enough new ones. So it crashed and burned. To many in the Star Trek community, it remains the black mark in an otherwise stellar franchise. (Yep, that pun was intended too.)
*I'd like to clarify this statement. Star Trek has prbably the most dedicated fans of any TV show and movie franchise in history. To be sure, these people will always be trekkers and will support the franchise and watch the shows and movies. What I refer to here are new viewers, people who have either never watched Star Trek or who have never been interested in it. "Non-fan, new viewers", so to speak.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Yikes.
Ever have one of those moments where you're totally freaking out and realize that you can't do much about what you're freaking out about? Yeah, I'm there.
So I'm needing a job for this summer, and don't have any leads as of yet. Today I intended to go out and look for a job all day. After all, finding a full-time job is a full-time job. But as I was pulling out of the driveway, I noticed something kind of important. My gas gauge was pretty much on empty. As I was out and about, I had to head back home after just one area of looking because I was out of gas. And I don't have any money for gas. Because I don't have a job. Oy! Talk about vicious circles!
So now I'm having to face the truth that I am totally and utterly dependent on God for a job. I can't job hunt because I don't have a vehicle in which to do so. I could use a bike, but I'm dependent on God supplying that bike. I don't really like being helpless at all. But I'm at the end of my rope. There is very little I am in control of. In fact, there is almost nothing I'm in control of, and that is very frustrating. I guess that's where faith comes in. When someone finally realizes they're not in control- God is - that's when they finally have to trust that He'll do what needs to be done.
"God will supply all my needs according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus." That's a Bible verse, for goodness sake! You'd think I'd get it in my thick skull and just believe it instead of relying on it as a last resort! But no. I still have a stubborn heart that thinks it can do this stuff by myself. But, thing is, I can't. I can't do all this stuff - this life - all by myself. And I have been a fool time and time again by trying to. I only pray that God doesn't need to gently bop me on the head too many more times so I actually take this to heart.
Trusting in someone else is kind of scary. Even when that someone is someone you love, it can be scary to not be in control. When I don't have control, sometimes I start thinking of how things could go wrong. Sometimes I'm arrogant enough to think that whatever the other person does, I know how to do it better. I know that is a problem of mine. But when it's God who's in control, I shouldn't have any doubts whatsoever. But I still do.
I guess this situation is one way he's working on me; chiseling me into the man he wants me to be. I know He's the only one who is really trustworthy, and he does know what's best for me. He can set stuff up so perfectly that I couldn't understand how in the world it possibly worked out. In my head, I know that I can trust God. I know enough of Bible stories to know that. But often times I find it hard to really believe that.
In a way, I'm glad that this is happening. I'm glad that God loves me enough to show me he loves me and not just tell me. I know that God's love will shine through this circumstance, no matter the outcome. Even if I don't see the true outcome of this situation for five, ten, or fifteen years, I know that He has something big planned.
Just gotta remind myself of that while it's happening.
Shalom, folks.
So I'm needing a job for this summer, and don't have any leads as of yet. Today I intended to go out and look for a job all day. After all, finding a full-time job is a full-time job. But as I was pulling out of the driveway, I noticed something kind of important. My gas gauge was pretty much on empty. As I was out and about, I had to head back home after just one area of looking because I was out of gas. And I don't have any money for gas. Because I don't have a job. Oy! Talk about vicious circles!
So now I'm having to face the truth that I am totally and utterly dependent on God for a job. I can't job hunt because I don't have a vehicle in which to do so. I could use a bike, but I'm dependent on God supplying that bike. I don't really like being helpless at all. But I'm at the end of my rope. There is very little I am in control of. In fact, there is almost nothing I'm in control of, and that is very frustrating. I guess that's where faith comes in. When someone finally realizes they're not in control- God is - that's when they finally have to trust that He'll do what needs to be done.
"God will supply all my needs according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus." That's a Bible verse, for goodness sake! You'd think I'd get it in my thick skull and just believe it instead of relying on it as a last resort! But no. I still have a stubborn heart that thinks it can do this stuff by myself. But, thing is, I can't. I can't do all this stuff - this life - all by myself. And I have been a fool time and time again by trying to. I only pray that God doesn't need to gently bop me on the head too many more times so I actually take this to heart.
Trusting in someone else is kind of scary. Even when that someone is someone you love, it can be scary to not be in control. When I don't have control, sometimes I start thinking of how things could go wrong. Sometimes I'm arrogant enough to think that whatever the other person does, I know how to do it better. I know that is a problem of mine. But when it's God who's in control, I shouldn't have any doubts whatsoever. But I still do.
I guess this situation is one way he's working on me; chiseling me into the man he wants me to be. I know He's the only one who is really trustworthy, and he does know what's best for me. He can set stuff up so perfectly that I couldn't understand how in the world it possibly worked out. In my head, I know that I can trust God. I know enough of Bible stories to know that. But often times I find it hard to really believe that.
In a way, I'm glad that this is happening. I'm glad that God loves me enough to show me he loves me and not just tell me. I know that God's love will shine through this circumstance, no matter the outcome. Even if I don't see the true outcome of this situation for five, ten, or fifteen years, I know that He has something big planned.
Just gotta remind myself of that while it's happening.
Shalom, folks.
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