Contentedly Single

So I've been single and content to be so for almost a year. It's a strange feeling that I don't think I've really understood until now. In junior high, I was in a relationship for 2 years. In high school, I was in a relationship for 3 years. After that, I was pining after a girl for another 2 years. Then, we were in a relationship long-distance for a year before I moved halfway across the country to be with her almost two years ago now. And about a year ago, we broke it off.

So it's been about a year that I've been single. It might be the longest stretch of time that I haven't been in a relationship or desired to be in a relationship. And it's really changed my perspective on relationships; made me rethink about why I would want to be in one.

Being contentedly single seems almost a contradiction. I very much desire to hold and be held; I desire to have someone by my side through thick and thin. Let's face it, I'm a bit lonely. But in this year, I've discovered that it's okay to be lonely. And this is why--

Our relationships we have here on earth, those of a platonic, familial, and romantic nature, are but an echo or reflection of our relationship with God. As good as these relationships we have with others can be, it's just a fraction of how good our relationship with God can be. And I'm convinced that it is because of God's perfect love.

God has a perfect love. He is love. He invented the thing. We, as humans, can only have an imperfect love because we are imperfect. We fail those we love; we don't fully understand love; we make decisions that are not out of love. That's where God is different -- he never fails. There is a passage in the Bible about love-

I Corinthians 13 4-8(a):
"Love is patient, love is kind, It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

Jesus is the true template for this passage. Replace every instance of "love" with "Jesus" and you have a very true passage. I won't go into it all right now, but Jesus truly embodies this passage in every way.

So even though earthly relationships can be rewarding, comforting, empowering and amazing, they're just a sliver of the relationship we can have with the Messiah. So after all this time of being single I'm still realizing this: I'd rather have a relationship as close as possible with God and no earthly romantic relationship than the other way around. I'll take God over a relationship any day.

But it is quite possible to have an amazingly close relationship with Messiah and an amazing relationship with a woman as well. That's really what this time of no dating means to me.

I don't want to be in a relationship unless that relationship builds up both of our relationships with Messiah. After all, it is only through building up our relationship with Messiah, and gaining a deeper understanding of his love, that we can truly love in the most pure way.